EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS | MOVIE REVIEW

EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS (from now on just called EXODUS) is Ridley Scott’s take on Moses. It released today in 2D and 3D and is basically playing everywhere. It is epic on every scale, production, cast, visual wow factor, run time, marketing and more. The film alone is worth it to see the wave scene but honestly, it is a tsunami of shite. Fails on so many levels, clock watched the crap out of it and my guest and I laughed at way too many scenes in the movie than we should have in a religious epic. EXODUS is released from 20th Century Fox, runs for what felt like 7hrs but was exactly 2hrs30mins and is rated M. In the words of my guest, Catherine, “the Disney version is so much better, it has songs.” All the best…….JK.

 

EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS WAVE MOVIE POSTER IMAGE
EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS | SALTY POPCORN MOVIE REVIEW | WAVE MOVIE POSTER IMAGE

 

REVIEW BY JASON KING 

EXODUS is based on the book of Exodus from that hugely fictional instruction guide to life written by people who believe they know better, yep, the bible. It is the story of Moses, you know, the guy who parts water, then writes the ten commandments onto a tablet, maybe picture Charlton Heston, yep, you got it. This time we have a big budget Hollywood version surprisingly starring Batman aka Christian Bale, a role that surprises me, I would never imagine him keen on playing this role but he took it because he was supposed to be Noah in NOAH, the role that big Russ took. Bale had to step out of NOAH due to scheduling conflicts and Darren Aronofsky is a friend/ fan of Scott so suggested Bale for the bearded warrior slave anti religious weird guy who sets about half a million slaves free from Egypt.

 

EXODUS GODS AND KINGS IMAGE
EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS | SALTY POPCORN MOVIE REVIEW | MOSES (CHRISTIAN BALE) ON A HORSE IN EGYPT

 

Ridley Scott knows how to make movies, he has given us GLADIATOR, BLADE RUNNER and ALIEN for crying out loud – the guy has genius in him. EXODUS is the closest thing he has done to GLADIATOR and it will always be compared to that. It fails on most levels. Perhaps your more religious believing people will love this film. I am agnostic and gay so I am fucked regardless, and I grew up Catholic (my guilt is epic), I know the story and they tell the basics of the story well. There is the bond of Moses and Rhamses, the family drama, the awakening of Moses, the banishment, the realisation and talking with God and then God being all punishing and wrath-like and then Moses big moment of saving half a million slaves. Then waters part and all is well in the world.

But the film fails firstly because it turns this religious epic into a Hollywood blockbuster and gives it love, romance, action and CGI, this is fine but the love story is so cheesy the cinema was laughing. The lines they say to each other a couple of times are woeful.

I found Bale OK as Moses but I am starting to realise I just don’t like the guy that much, he was great as Batman, he suited it, but ever since hearing his explosive rant from T4 I just see him as an arrogant tool with an inflated ego and sense of entitlement, this suited the Batman character. Personal choices people, no need to send out a lynching mob for dissing the guy. Still think EMPIRE OF THE SUN was his best movie, he actually laughed and had good range in that movie.

 

EXODUS GODS AND KINGS MOVIE IMAGE
EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS | SALTY POPCORN MOVIE REVIEW | RHAMSES (JOEL EDGERTON), MOSES (CHRISTIAN BALE) AND TUYA (SIGOURNEY WEAVER)

 

My biggest problems are the writing and casting. If making this into a decent Hollywood-based-loosely-formed-from-a-bible-book/ movie you need to keep it moving with good character development and story, they do this with Bale but fail with everyone else. My first thoughts, the film failed to have Edgerton as a decent nemesis like they did with Joaquin Phoenix in GLADIATOR. Having John Turturro as Seti was horrible casting. Sigourney Weaver, one of the best actresses on the planet, utilised to her potential – nope – stupid wasted character that had about three lines, should have gone to a no-one, did the exact same thing with Ben Kinglsey as Nun – wasting talent this big is bordering on sacrilege. Aaron (Breaking Bad) Paul as Joshua – what the actual fuck? He was like a mute person who stood in the background and just fawned over Batman’s greatness, what was the purpose of having him watch Moses talk to God most of the time? Was he there to highlight faith in greatness? And Edgerton, he did what he could ok, I feared though that as an audience, we needed to dislike him more, he does some mean things, but has issues deciding on doing the mean things and then we see him as an awesome dad and husband, “awwwwww, that’s OK, you are just conflicted.” BORING. And Rhamses’ end – don’t even get me started! I do have to hand it to one actor though, that stood out – Ben Mendelsohn totally owns as Hegel, loved this character. 

The worst part of the entire movie – GOD – nope, not the man himself, the fact they chose a 12yr old petulant child to play him, did my head in!

 

EXODUS GODS AND KINGS IMAGE
EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS | SALTY POPCORN MOVIE REVIEW | MOSES (CHRISTIAN BALE) AND THE PARTED SEAS

 

Towards the end when the CGI comes into effect the film becomes visually epic, I just wished they got there sooner as the buildup was not worth it. You can take or leave the 3D of the movie, and the fact they did not cast truly ethnic roles for the characters is silly. The characters looked the part, the parts were just poorly written. The film will make big money in the first week and then tank like the end of FURY. But what do I know, I am a heathen. Let us know what you think and I hope you enjoy it more than I did.

 

2 and a Half Pops

 

 

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