Salty’s Top 20 Pieces of Shit Movies for 2017
2017 has seen so many sublime movies. A year that appears to have seen quality in film skyrocket. But always with greatness there must be balance and as such, as always, there was a lot of shit. I mean some stuff so shit it shouldn’t have seen production in the first place and made the Salty Kernels gag hard. My eternal gratefulness to the Salty Kernels in their support of watching a lot of shit with me and continuing the now ten year old Salty Popcorn. I now present to you the Salty Popcorn Top 20 Pieces of Shit Movies of 2017. The funny thing is the first two I loved haha – but the Kernels have spoken :).
20 King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
I actually loved this movie and own it on Blu Ray – thought it was marvellous haha. But the rest of the team had it in their votes as a piece of shit so I had to include it – hence the last, Number 20, position.
Salty Score from JK: 4 Pops – RT Score: 30%
19 Power Rangers
LOL – I actually also enjoyed this one – it stayed true to the TV show I grew up watching and actually am looking forward to the next one in the series. Again my Kernels have voted :(.
Salty Score from JK: 3.5 Pops – RT Score: 44%
18 Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
Salty Score from JK: 2.5 Pops RT Score: 49%
17 Geostorm
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 2 Pops – RT Score: 13%
16 Resident Evil: The Final Chapter
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 2 Pops – RT Score: 36%
15 The Mummy
Salty Score from JK: 2 Pops – RT Score: 16%
14 The Dinner
Salty Score from Kernel John: 2 Pops – RT Score: 48%
13 Transformers: The Last Knight
Salty Score from JK: 2 Pops – RT Score: 16%
12 Flatliners
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 1.5 Pops – RT Score: 5%
11 A Few Less Men
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 1.5 Pops – RT Score: 15%
10 Assassin’s Creed
Salty Score from Kernel Blake: 1.5 Pops – RT Score: 17%
9 All Eyez On Me
This was a funny one, Kernel Jack panned it – it was in all honesty a piece of shit, but the Cousin of the filmmaker sent us, or more Jack, a threatening tweet. We totally thought Jack was going to be shot drive-by style after we posted the review.
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 1.5 Pops – RT Score: 18%
8 Baywatch
I got so angry at this movie – it was the end of my support for anything from Zac Efron, until he redeemed himself in THE GREATEST SHOWMAN. My god BAYWATCH was a piece of shit.
Salty Score from JK: 1.5 Pops – RT Score: 18%
7 Wonder Wheel
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 1.5 Pops – RT Score: 30%
6 The Snowman
Salty Score from Kernel Blake: 1.5 Pops RT Score: 8%
5 Chips
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 1 Pops – RT Score: 17%
4 Fifty Shades Darker
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 1 Pops – RT Score: 10%
3 The Dark Tower
Salty Score from Kernel Blake: 1 Pops – RT Score: 16%
2 Rings
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 0.5 Pops – RT Score: 7%
…………………..and the biggest piece of shit for 2017 couldn’t be more appropriate – it was almost ironic……………………..
1 Emoji Movie
Salty Score from Kernel Jack: 0.5 Pops – RT Score: 9%
Thanks for saving me from seeing a single one of those movies…. Phew!
Hahaha – u are very welcome 🙂
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